


Way too cute

by boxofwonder



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Cute pink vibrators, Don't be fooled by the sexual content tag nothing even happens, Gen, Kyoutani is a flustered mess trying to unpack his purchase, Sex Toys, Tbh this could be considered fluff, Well one at least, You've been warned, but still
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-03
Updated: 2016-09-03
Packaged: 2018-08-12 19:00:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,119
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7945612
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/boxofwonder/pseuds/boxofwonder
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The parcel is white and nondescript and it's been sitting untouched and daunting at the end of his bed for hours now. <br/>Kyoutani has slowly eased himself closer like it's a distrusting dog, just minding his own business pretending he doesn't even notice its presence at first, then moving from the desk to his floor, and finally, now, he's sitting cross-legged on his pillow staring it down.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Way too cute

**Author's Note:**

  * For [talonyth](https://archiveofourown.org/users/talonyth/gifts).



> I'm still pretty offended at how cute this turned out? Omg.

The parcel is white and nondescript and it's been sitting untouched and daunting at the end of his bed for hours now.

Kyoutani has slowly eased himself closer like it's a distrusting dog, just minding his own business pretending he doesn't even notice its presence at first, then moving from the desk to his floor, and finally, now, he's sitting cross-legged on his pillow staring it down.

His heart is pounding. His palms are sweaty. He is so intimidated but at last he's too impatient to wait much longer.

With a deep breath, Kyoutani slaps his cheeks, and reaches over to the box. (It does not actually burn him or spontaneously explode, so that's cool.)

He pries off the tape with painstaking effort, which seems suited enough. No adventurer gets to the true treasure without encountering mild panic and some obstacles on the way. Oh god, this is so fucking exciting and embarrassing. Fingers sticky with the tape residue he casts several nervous glances around. Gets up and makes doubly sure his door is still locked, even though his parents are out the whole weekend.

The curtains are pulled shut.

As far as he knows nobody installed any cameras in here recently.

He's good to go.

With a muffled noise he flops back on his mattress, the parcel bouncing along enthusiastically and rattling as its inside tumble.

Groaning, Kyoutani buries his flushed face in his palms. Okay, deep breath. He can do this. He's faced much more intimidating things, _dammit._

Finally, he pries the last strip of tape away, the flaps of the parcel now taunting him to stop being a coward and look inside.

He'll be damned if he'll be bested by a parcel.

Before he can change his mind - heart jumping in his throat – Kyoutani reaches out and flips the parcel open. His eyes spy a flash of pink wrapping paper before he shoves it closed again, flops on his back with legs pulled to his chest, and gives an embarrassed screech. He rolls over sideways, breathes in deeply.

_It's so cute._ God! And that's just the wrapping paper!

Fine. Okay. He's braved awkward smalltalk with Oikawa Tooru once, he can unpack this parcel.

Kyoutani pushes himself up, entirely ruffled, and opens the parcel again. Stares at the smooth, crinkly, light pink wrapping paper and feels a ridiculous grin sneaking onto his face he can not for the love of him will away.

Very carefully – almost startled at the sound of the paper – he folds it away.

This time he screeches and pushes the whole box away as far as it will go and still allow him to hold it shut with both his hands like a wild animal might bust free from it otherwise. Breathing heavily and staring wide-eyed at a blank spot on his wall, he sits like this until his heart stops threatening to give out.   
One sliver of pink through clear packaging and he'd _lost_ it. A startled laugh escapes Kyoutani. This is so exhilarating and so _thoroughly_ embarrassing. Thank god nobody will ever know.

Heart pounding, he slowly opens the parcel a peek again, catches sight of a playful pink curve, and pushes the parcel shut again with a flustered, unabashed grin. His cheeks are burning and he can't stop _grinning._ It looks so adorable … and he hadn't even found the bravery to look at it entirely. The thought of touching it sends him into another fit of burying his face and screeching. But the fact that this cute little thing _exists_ on his bed and _in his care_ is so … delightful.

Kyoutani takes another steadying breath and opens the parcel back up, looking for two heartbeats longer this time, long enough to see the two bottles resting in the parcel as well, and the edge of a pack of batteries. Hoo.

Not that he cares much for the, uh, maintenance – when there's a pink, bunny-shaped – god, he can't even _think_ the word yet and just pushes the parcel shut to fling himself away from it, curled up on himself and nose smushed into his pillow. He giggles into the fabric, actually giggles, _gosh,_ and takes a bit to steady himself again. He can unpack the batteries, right? Small steps. He got this.

Slowly and entire face _burning_ by now, Kyoutani faces the parcel once more, shoves his hand in real quick and flings the batteries out like they're buried in a pool of poisonous snakes.

In his hurry they slip from his grasp, fly to the bed's edge and drop between the bed and the wall. At least that poses a distraction and several minutes of awkwardly fishing for them, before Kyoutani faces the next thing to unpack.

Eyes closed, he blindly gets the first bottle he can grasp, and at least finds the courage somehow, to read the label. Toy disinfectant. Okay, _enough_ reading. Kyoutani slams the bottle into the mattress with his fist and abandons it entirely. Then, he fishes the lube out of the parcel, too, and decides belatedly that those are better right shoved into his night dresser and forgotten until they become … relevant.

With a choked noise he yanks the drawer open, throws both bottles in with hollow thunks, and slams the drawer shut with so much force he can hear them roll around in it. So maybe he'll have to store this a little more sneakily, but for now – for now there's only one thing left in the parcel, nestled safely in the cute wrapping paper. Even _cuter_ than the paper.

Gosh, it's so cute. These things have no business being so _cute._

Kyoutani is a little bit in love.

(He takes another peek at it and okay, he's a lot, like, a lot in love.)

God. Can he touch it? He should touch it. Not unwrap it. Just … sloooowly … take one edge of the corner of its packaging … juuuust … get it out there … and drop it. There. That wasn't all too hard. Okay, his heart is hammering and Kyoutani feels like bolting from his own bed now, but, hey. The parcel is empty save for the pretty paper, for which Kyoutani doesn't have much eyes anymore. He just stuffs it back in and shoves the box under his bed, and then turns to face

Just sitting there, innocently enough.

He can't believe this is happening.

He can't believe he owns a cute, bunny-shaped -

Kyoutani dedicates one minute to shallow breathing, two minutes to general freaking, five minutes to sulking at his desk drumming his fingers on it nervously, and then returns with determination. For a first attempt, he runs his fingers over the curves of the v- the _thing –_ through the packaging, and only mildly has a heart attack. This feels so … adventurous and exciting. And a little (a lot) sinful in a way that only makes it more exhilarating. Like Kyoutani is doing something forbidden, that kind of thrill. It makes him shiver.

One more cautious glance around. Nobody has attempted to break in through the door, or the windows, or last-minute drill a hole through the floor or ceiling to sneak a camera in. All is still well. Nobody knows, this is Kyoutani's little secret, and he enjoys every minute of it.

It takes him one hell of a lot more cautious poking and turning until he feels ready to actually unwrap the thing, and once he does, Kyoutani can't touch it at all – he just shakes it onto the bed unceremoniously and does the 1-2-5 breathing-freaking-brooding routine once more before he returns, face burning as bright as human faces can burn without literally busting into flame.

There is a pink, bunny-shaped, absolutely adorable vibrator just lying unassumingly on his bed and when Kyoutani runs his fingers across it in wonder he marvels at the smooth, silky feeling to it. It's beautiful and curvy and quirky and really, really adorable and all these facts make his toe curl even more than everything else owning such a thing implies.

He just really, really, _really_ enjoys owning something this pretty and silky and outrageously pink.

At the thought he drops backwards onto his bed again, instinct kicking in as if he's an animal playing dead or something, and he just lies there and grins to himself and breathes for a while, feels his own pulse down to his fingertips and relishes in the giddy feeling.

Ha. He did that. He had ordered that. He had _unpacked_ that.

That was the best decision he's ever made at 2.30 a.m. which – granted, is not hard to achieve 'cause he usually makes shit decisions at 2.30 a.m., but _still._ He's feeling almost adventurous enough to repeat that particular evening and maybe order something else, that's how drunk he is on the feeling of simply owning a toy.

Though he should probably get used to _this one_ first. With a snort, he pushes himself back up, this time adventurous enough to actually pick it up and put it into his palm, slowly turning and looking at it. What a pretty little thing. He presses the buttons experimentally even though he knows nothing will happen yet, and realises with a pleasant jolt that he _did_ unpack batteries (right, that explains the thing uncomfortably digging into his butt) and he can totally get this little thing to run.

Tongue between his teeth he twists to grasp them and tears the package open feeling trembly and excited and _really_ adventurous. Maybe a little cool, even. He bets none of his peers bragging and drawling on about girlfriends and such would have actually had the guts to go ahead and get themselves a bright, flashy toy like this.

They're all smoke and mirrors with whatever they pretend they got going while Kyoutani is the one kneeling on his bed red-faced and bright-eyed trying to find where to put the batteries into his vibrator. Oh _god_ this is happening.

He drops it and evacuates his bed to sit in the furthest corner of the room with his head in his hands until he can breathe calmly again. Somehow, he's still grinning through the whole ordeal, but it's a terrified grin. Hadn't even known that was a thing that happened. But it sure does. Right now.

This is _happening_.

Kyoutani takes another deep, steadying breath and then gets back to his feet, steeling his shoulders. He is a man. He will certainly best Iwaizumi in armwrestling (and everything else) one day and he will brace putting batteries into his vibrator.

He sways away from his beeline to the bed and walks in a long curve to his desk instead, putting his palms down on it.

Okay. _Okay._ Alright!

This time he manages to flop down on the bed again, and after some more intense staring, finding the battery compartment at last. He slides them in and closes the lid again, sitting with a pounding heart and the vibrator on his palm like it may very well explode in his face.

Endless, agonising heartbeats later it's still just him and the thing. Nothing explodes. Nobody bursts into his room shouting 'I _knew it!'_ and pointing fingers.

Everything's fine.

Closing his eyes Kyoutani thinks _Well, here goes nothing,_ and pushes the button. The thing springs to life immediately. With a startled yelp he drops it and it flies in a sad little arc and clatters on the ground. Like the real trooper it is, it keeps merrily vibrating there and going _vrrrrr_ as it slowly edges across the floor.

Kyoutani watches its determined path for a couple centimetres, snorting at first, and then bursting into laughter. He doubles over, watches the thing keep struggling and buzzing, and laughs until his stomach hurts and there are tears at the corners of his eyes. He feels so oddly light and shaky and completely amused when he finally leans down and snatches it up, and laughs harder at the odd sensation of the vibrations through his hand. Jeez.

He hits more buttons, chuckling to himself still, cycling through the programs it has to offer until he reaches the end and it sighs back into silence.

Then he flops on his mattress, stares up at the ceiling, chest light and a doofy grin still on his face. This is the most fun he's had in ages and he hasn't even tried the thing for its intended use.

Best. Purchase.

Ever.

 

(When he does finally give it a shot, it's, like – hitting a spike just right and scoring, savouring hot, fresh pizza after going hungry all day. Like, all the _really_ good stuff neatly wrapped into one toe-curlingly awesome sensation. So, yeah. Definitely, _definitely_ worth the money.)

 


End file.
